ProNurse

I went through this on my last placement and sympathise with how you are feeling, it's awful when this happens, I became quite ill with all the worry and my confidence plummeted. Some mentors just should not be doing the job.

If you have had positive comments before and passed everything then you should have nothing to worry about. Speak to your link nurse and your tutor explaining what difficulties you have been having with this person and the reasons why.

I was hauled in front of the link nurse who told me the problem was with me because everyone else enjoys this particular placement!  Afterwards she spoke to another nurse on the ward who put her straight and explained that there were masive problems on the ward and it was no wonder I was feeling miserable with that mentor. My very next placement was fantastic and I got excellent feedback.

It is unfortunate that so much depends on having a good rapport with your mentor and that so many of them seem to take pleasure in making students feel bad rather than working with them so that they can improve and gain in confidence. I never realised it would be like this.

Try to keep thinking positive and keep your chin up, things will improve I am sure.

Oh gosh Ally, I am so unhappy for you. I am a staff nurse in community and we have students with us all the time, some are fab and some not so! Community is a very, very different place from hospital and the sooner my colleagues realise this the better. I cannot make things right between you and your mentor but you can.......you have the absolute right to make a comment about this person and how she has made you feel and that is what you must do.

Sometimes having a student with me is such a ball-ache!!!! seriously..a ball-ache but.....in 20 years time I will be that old lady needing a dressing, or  an enema, or a full nursing assessment for continuing health care and the nurse that I want to do that is one that is happy, comfortable and competent in what he/she does, that nurse will hopefully have been mentored by somebody like me. I do not have a passion for teaching but I certainly have a passion for students getting a good experience that they will use and take with them until they are that old lady or gent needing a dressing, an enema etc, etc.

Ally, stick to your principles and do not be intimidated by tutors or mentors, the mentor you are having issues with may already have a bit of a track record so to speak......it may be them and not you with the problem.

Glad to hear the news, I am sure that you will make a very good nurse.

dingdongthewitch says ...

Nice one . We all come up against people that we just don't seem to gel with, it happens everywhere but I think it is the mentor that has the problem and not you. How dare she tell you that you are too quiet etc. If she was any sort of decent mentor she would be using techniques to bolster and affirm your confidence, not knock you down.....she sounds like a total arse to me. I am so glad that you are getting support from the link tutor....remember this Ally, you may yet get to give her an enema or set up a diamorphine syringe driver or dress her malodorous leg ulcers when she is old and frail and I am sure she will be grateful for a softly spoken, dignified and confident nurse and not a loud-mouthed know all bully. xx. Result I say

Brilliantly put. We should nurture the next generation of nurses - not try to intimidate and bully them.

Your point about the future care from currwent students is well made too. I had a brilliant nurse tutor when i was a student. She's probably retiresd now but you never know - she may still be around to guide another group of 'victims' into the profession.

She specialised in elderly care until becoming a nurse tutor in Stafford. Her name was Sally Scattergood (yes I know it's an unlikely name). If you're reading this Sally - say hello. Some things you said were never forgotten.

One of those things was this:

The care that we give and the care that we teach is the care that we will receive.

Cheers,

Stuart